Release Yourself


There are two types of guilt. Functional guilt and dysfunctional guilt

Functional guilt serve the purpose, it makes you feel bad – guilty – when you have done something wrong. It urges you to do the right thing. For example if you lashed out at your coworker or spouse because you were in a bad mood; Or say as a child, you stole something from someone. In this case, guilt is functional and helps you think about what you did wrong and how to make it right and what to try not to do in the future.

Dysfunctional guilt does not serve a purpose. Like when you feel guilty for something happening that was out of your control or beyond your circumstance. This type of guilt just makes you feel bad without a solution. People dwell on the feeling and allow it to bring them down despite the situation not being a result of the “guilty person’s” direct intent or action. For example, kids often feel bad or guilty when something happens to their parents – like if they lose their job or have no money to pay the bills. As adults we sometimes feel guilty when we have friends or family in bad situations and cannot help them. We feel guilty because we think we SHOULD be helping them, or fixing their situation. The reality of it though, is that you are not the cause of their situation, you don’t have intentions to make them endure a hard time, and this type of guilt does not serve a helping purpose.

You can let go of dysfunctional guilt and accept the situation as is while still showing empathy and compassion.

Published by K.S.

Full time tradeswoman, mom and wife, I consider myself an advocate for children, mental well-being, and drive for change. Coming from a broken home and a hurtful raising left me struggling for the rest of my life, continuously in and out of doctors, hospitals, therapists and pharmacies. I just wanted to be and feel normal. Who knew that becoming a parent would help all that? My fear of ever letting my child feel the way I did growing up drove me into the books, research, and parenting community. Absorbing everything like a sponge, from development, children psychology, and child-rearing, to judgement, PPD, and establishing boundaries. Despite my blog name, I'm not here to judge but to share my knowledge of poor parenting from first hand experiences, and educate others on new ways to approach things. The name "The Judgemental Mom" doesn't really mean that it's a site to judge others, but a site about other's who are judgemental, or who claim I am judgmental. Pop over to my site to learn more great things about yourself, children, DIY and more.

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