It’s hard, sometimes, to be a gentle parent. Especially when we didn’t grow up with gentle parents. Even then, parenting can be hard. Really hard; and all of us parents know that – just some of us have more emotional skills than others. That doesn’t make those parents better or worse than the others.
Sometimes when our children are not following our agenda, and on our time, they push back. As gentle parents, it’s our job to acknowledge why they’re pushing back, and validate their feelings. But things still can be frustrating for us. Especially if we ran out of time to take our time.
So in these moments it’s important to validate our own feelings.
We have to remember to be as gentle with ourselves as we are trying to be with our children.
Sometimes we need to tell ourself, “okay I’m feeling frustrated”, “I’m disappointed with myself because I didn’t plan enough time”, “I’m nervous I’m going to get in trouble for being late for work”, “I’m anxious that it makes me look bad when I have poor timing”, “i’m upset that things are not going smoothly”, etc.
Children learn gentleness best by their parents and others being gentle with them; but also by watching others be gentle with themselves. This is important, too, because we can’t always be there when our children are having a hard time. Sometimes they’re in school, daycare, at a friend’s, at their other parents place, grandparents place, etc. In these moments, they can begin to practice treating themselves how they have watched others treat themselves.
More so, we just need to cut ourself some slack. We set high enough standards for ourselves when trying to better our children and our future Generations.
Breath in, breathe out. We’re only human. It is okay if life feels a little heavy sometimes.